A woman invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?” “I wouldn’t know what to say,” the little girl replied. “Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the mother said. The little girl bowed her head and said, “Dear Lord, why on Earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”
Our children will imitate everything we do and say. At times I catch myself saying and doing things my mother said and did when I was a child. One quality I am trying to imitate of my parents is to instill honor for authority in my children. Disrespect was not tolerated by my father. It was very clear that if we showed disrespect to our mother or our teachers we were going to be disciplined. The honor heritage that was passed on to me is a Godly trait that must continue to be passed on to the future generation.
Our society reeks of dishonor. Dishonor to parents in the sitcoms of television. Dishonor to the marriage covenant in all the pornography on the internet. Dishonor to moral values with all the PG-13 rated movies that condone sexual promiscuity. It is all around us and creeping into the church world. Even ministers dropping like flies to adultery and homosexuality.
Honor was established back in the Old Testament when the people of God needed laws in order to protect themselves from sin and to live on the earth. God called Moses to go to the mountain to receive the 10 commandments in order for the people to have a way to walk with God. Isn’t it interesting that through one of the 10 commandments the people learned that if they would honor their parents they would be granted long life. In Exodus 20:12, it says “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you.” Long life is the result of showing honor to parents.
I believe in children showing honor to their parents and elders. In the Yanney house the biggest infraction would have to be showing disrespect and dishonor. My children know that dishonor equals a spanking. If we ran our households like the Old Testament homes, many a child this day would not even think about mouthing off to his mother or giving a mocking eye to his father.
II Ki 2:23-25 gives an account of some youth who showed dishonor to their elder, Elisha. II Kings 2:23-25 reads, “Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead! So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.” Dishonor was not tolerated with the man of God. Or what about the rebellious look or the rolling of eyes when a child doesn’t want to comply with obedience? Prov 30:17 says “the eye that mocks his father, and scorns obedience to his mother, the ravens of the valley will pick it out, and the young eagles will eat it.” Many times I have used this passage to let my children know the severity of dishonor to authority. Thank God for our covenant of grace under which we live, but we need to take a strong stand against the infectious disease of dishonor.
We as Proverbs 31 women must instill honor into our household. Prov 31:25 says “Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come.” If we as mothers discipline dishonor we will rejoice in time to come because our children will be children who honor the Lord. So how do we instill honor?
Some practical ways to teach honor that we have used in our house is to speak to an adult with a tone of voice that shows honor. Many times it is the tone of voice we use that shows the attitude of the heart. Children need to learn to speak with a reverent attitude instead of a sarcastic tone. If my child is speaking to me with a sarcastic tone of voice, I correct it and always make them ask again with a different tone of voice. Dishonor will try to creep in but if you take care of the little foxes they will never become a big problem.
Another way we show honor in our house is to call an adult by their last name or give a title to an adult like “Miss Trish” or “Mrs. Yanney.” This keeps a healthy distance between the child and the adult and it reminds the children that they are speaking with a person in authority. It is important that children refer to their parents as mom and dad and not by their first names. Children have been given to the parents and they are to honor their place of authority.
No matter what part of the country you are from, helping children use phrases like “Yes Ma’am” and “No Ma’am” or “Yes Sir” and “No Sir,” “Please” and “Thank You” are all ways to teach honor. Helping them to be polite when they speak will remind them not to be selfish and demand their own way.
Reminding your children of these scriptures such as Eph 6:2-4 which says, “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth,” will instill honor in their hearts. They need to know that honor brings long life and as they are obedient to God they will reap the results and the benefits of a long and prosperous life.
So give your children the heritage of honor so that they may live a long and prosperous life and they will learn to honor God as a result of honoring you!